The Grey Area: Elisa Marshall
Elisa Marshall
The Grey Area
The ‘grey area’ is the liminal space between career and family life—where ambition and possibility meet the sweet slowness of motherhood. In this series, we hand the mic to women we admire, asking them for details on how they mix creative pursuits with parenting.
Elisa Marshall was known as maman, the French word for “mama,” well before her first baby. As the co-founder (with her husband, Ben) and creative director behind the beloved Maman cafés and the author of Maman: The Cook Book, Elisa is the essence of the brand—a blend of French and North American, down to earth and yet, so chic. When Elisa had her first son, she wanted to be equally hands on with him. We got her take on how to actively create flexibility when motherhood and restaurants are around-the-clock jobs.
Where I Am in the Grey
Creating flexibility: Running Maman is a round-the-clock job. I am so invested that it’s not something I can easily turn off ‘after hours’. Once I started experiencing pregnancy symptoms with my oldest, I knew it was time to make a shift in my workload. At the moment, I split my time between being an in-office entrepreneur and staying at home with my son, Yves. Although both roles are 24-hour jobs, I am now in a position where I can focus on being home for three days and in the office for four.
Downshifting: I spent a full week writing down all of my tasks–from email topics, to calls, to meetings. From there, I asked myself what I could do remotely, what I do not enjoy doing, and what roles I’m not exceptionally good at. Not only did that help me delegate and focus, but this exercise (which I now do constantly) has also been a large factor in growing our business. As I have grown the company from being my husband and me running all aspects to having more than 200 employees, this practice has ensured that I continue to genuinely love what I am doing–and that I am adding value where it is needed.
Pro Tip: Try this exercise in any area of your life that bogs you down. Give yourself time to tune into your daily tasks and discover what items you can delegate to others. Use this opportunity to offload tasks that steal your joy and can be picked up by a partner, or budgeted to hire out.
The Perspective That Eased My ‘Mom Guilt’
When I started working part-time after Yves was born, I felt like I was giving only 50 percent of my time and energy to my son, and 50 percent to my career. I was struggling to merge these two areas of my life, as in my mind they were very separate and could not be done in combination with one another.
Then, a simple phrase from my friend Jenna gave me a fresh perspective: She referred to a work/life blend as opposed to a work/life balance, helping me realize I had to change my ways to allow parenthood and business to coexist with one another. I had to accept that it’s OK to step out of a meeting when my nanny calls, and OK to answer emails on the couch while Yves is enjoying solo play time. I gave myself permission to do two things at once, and that for me was the best advice in juggling a career while being a mom!
How I Blend Work With Motherhood
I was fortunate to have a very calm baby and I started at an early age bringing him everywhere with me. I wanted him to be accustomed to napping with noise, movement, and chaos surrounding him, as I knew he was going to need to be adaptable in that kind of environment.
For the first three months, the baby lived in the Artipope Carrier attached to me while I was testing recipes in the kitchen, in the restaurants (even serving tables!), and running to various sites and meetings.
In the early days, we would get creative turning our jackets inside out and making makeshift beds, AKA a baby centerpiece in the middle of the table. One of my favorite memories is of flying to Chicago for a corporate board meeting and having Yves sleep soundly in the middle of the table!
In the early days, we would get creative turning our jackets inside out and making makeshift beds, AKA a baby centerpiece in the middle of the table. One of my favorite memories is of flying to Chicago for a corporate board meeting and having Yves sleep soundly in the middle of the table!
I also have had a pack ‘n play in my office. I was able to keep him safe and contained beside me. Now, two years later, I have swapped that for a mini office set-up beside me with his own calculator, toy laptop, and some play food. He loves going there and pretending to work just like ‘maman and papa,’ so on my sitter-less days, he loves coming along with me. I also have an iPad because he’s not that good of a toddler!
Letting Go of the “Super Mom” Mindset
The power of community: Having childcare has been the biggest help in running a business alongside motherhood– someone I can trust who allows me to step back. We all have that “super mom” mentality that says we can do everything and juggle it all. But asking for help and leaning on my community has been the most important thing to ensure I have time for work.
On turn-taking with my spouse: My husband and I each have our designated tasks that we look after when it comes to parenting and work, (our strengths, as we often call them). Of course, we are always there to help each other out when needed. However, Ben looks after wake-up, morning snacks, diaper changes, and more while I sleep in. Once I’m up, I take over while he gets ready and walks the dog.
We also have a nice routine for evenings: Ben makes dinner, while I sit and feed Yves. Ben looks after playtime and pre-bedtime, while I handle putting Yves to sleep. We naturally fell into this routine and it really helps us to plan out our mornings and evenings, while allowing for time to ourselves.
How I Ace Mealtimes With My Toddler
I bought a mini six-form muffin tin to serve snacks for my son. He loves seeing the assortment of items, organizing them, switching places for things, and counting. It turns snack time into a fun activity too! My go-to items are usually grapes, Annie's cheesy bunnies, raisins, veggie rounds/sticks etc. This is also a fun way to present an assortment of veggies and fill one or two with hummus and dip.
Muffin Tin from Amazon
The Shopping List I Lean On
Concealer:
“I love this concealer. It gives great coverage and is in a cute, easy-to-transport package.”
Snack Spinner:
What kid can resist a spinning snack tray? It’s travel-friendly, leak-proof, and dishwasher-safe.
Artipope Carrier
“For the first three months, the baby lived in the Artipope Carrier attached to me while I was testing recipes in the kitchen, in the restaurants (even serving tables!).”
Leggings:
“Currently living in these. Pre- and post-pregnancy, they are amazing!”
Maman Coffee:
“We just launched a wonderful private label brand of coffee–our 'merci' blend with notes of brown sugar, cocoa, and baking spice. It’s available in all stores and also ships nationwide!
Collapsible Snack Cup:
These cups are eco-friendly, (made from food-grade silicone), and perfect for on-the-go snacking.
