It’s Time To Let Go of the Antiquated Notion of 'Stay-At-Home' Mom
by Neha Ruch
If we let go of any tired thought during our month of spring cleaning, let it be the antiquated notion of the ‘stay-at-home’ mom.
Every mother works. Full stop. Over generations in this country, we’ve built polarizing archetypes in American culture of the women who go into an office and the women who stay home. Two ends of a spectrum that is so broad, complex, and grey.
From the moment parenthood begins, every mother will work harder than they has worked before. For those who give birth, our bodies prepare us during ten months of pregnancy—our minds slowly responding to biology and rewiring for our children’s needs. We move from the day-to-day of our former selves to getting poked and prodded at appointments to preparing our homes to taking extra-conscious care of our health. Then the months after we recover from childbirth, some of our bodies physically nurture these little beings. As parents, we vow to keep safe these vulnerable little ones, while we track milestones and learn as much as we can about their nuanced needs and wants. Then our roles evolve to teaching, entertaining, and designing and facilitating their small worlds—activities, schooling, and a nurturing home and family unit, which is no small feat.
However it is we enter parenthood, the healthy and happy development of our children is the biggest job we will have—whether we make it our full time priority, or we hold it sacred alongside paid work.
The healthy and happy development of our children is the biggest job we will have—whether we make it our full time priority, or we hold it sacred alongside paid work.
I had ten years of brand experience before I became a mother and by far, the re-brand of the “stay-at-home mother” is my biggest and most fascinating challenge.
At some point in our society, Americans created broad generalizations and assumptions about the women who chose to prioritize home and family for periods of time.
If we achieve one thing with the Mother Untitled dialogue, I hope it’s that we put a face to the category of mothers who confidently and consciously choose to restructure work, build their own business for more control, or take a full pause to create space to parent. I hope we can slowly undo the stereotypes of the “stay-at-home mother” and recognize this group as a vast and diverse pool of women who are creative, connected, and relevant—while giving much of themselves and their time to their families.
I believe that if this category of women are celebrated for taking on the role of raising children, and truly seen for all of their dimensions, they will be that much more accepted and supported when they choose to shift back into the paid workforce. Because they never stopped working.
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